The! Biggest! News! of! the! Day! - Not GM Earnings, Dow Jones Rejection or Productivity

Here are some of the contenders for today's biggest...news...of...the...day...

• Word that the board of directors for Dow Jones & Co (DJ) will not to act on the takeover bid from News Corp (NWS)...this comes after the Bancroft family, which controls the majority of the DJ shares, said they oppose the deal...
• Lackluster earnings from General Motors (GM)...the automakers results were hurt "due in large part to its financial services unit's exposure to the non-prime sector of the residential mortgage business"...
• Data from the weekly jobless claims report...claims fell 21,000...
• Data on productivity...
• A selloff in the shares of Swiss bank UBS (UBS) after the firm closed a hedge fund arm...subprime mortgage losses spurred the closure...
• A new chip from IBM that "analysts say could fundamentally change the way chips are made and dramatically improve their efficiency"...(note - will this finally lead to a flying car? If not, then wake me when that happens...)

While those are all stories worth watching, I think it is obviously clear that the biggest story is this - Bigfoot risks extinction, says Canadian MP...yes that is correct...someone in a position of power in Canadian has actually "called for Bigfoot to be protected under Canada's species at risk act, alongside Whooping Cranes, Blue Whales, and Red Mulberry trees"...it is said that Bigfoot "is not shy, merely so rare it risks extinction and should be protected as an endangered species"...

I am really just at a loss for words here...