The! Biggest! News! of! the! Day! - Not Earnings from American Eagle, Target or Countrywide Buyout

Here are some of the contenders for today's biggest...news...of...the...day...

• Speculation that Warren Buffett might be interested in buying Countrywide Financial Corp (CFC)...
• Better-than-expected earnings from American Eagle Outfitters (AEO)...
• Earnings from Target Corp. (TGT)...
• A look into "the mortgage domino effect"...
• A move to safety as it is said "that investors are fleeing investments that carry even the slightest hint of risk"...
• Data that shows that "Americans earned a smaller average income in 2005 than in 2000"...
• A look into "social investing"...
• Some ideas for how to "fix" Wal-Mart Stores (WMT)...

While those are all stories worth watching, I think it is obviously clear that the biggest story is this - Duathlon organisers insure against Loch Ness monster attack...according to the article, "Organisers of a duathlon in Scotland have taken out a one-million-pound (1.46-million-euro, 1.97-million-dollar) insurance policy against attack by or sighting of the fabled Loch Ness monster"...a spokesman for the insurer said, "This is one of our more unusual requests but it certainly gave our team something to get their teeth into"...

Is "something to get their teeth into" a polite way of saying "when we stopped laughing we gladly accepted their money"? Some things just make my brain hurt...

Meanwhile, my colleague Mark "the tackler" Fightmaster highlights this story as a "biggest news" contender - Bears eat man at beer festival...as Mark oh so correctly points out, one line says it all, - "Only an idiot would jump into the bear cage"...